credits

Anyway yeah. Health's not good.

I'm really feeling super exasperated with myself, i keep feeling so unwell.

Fever here and there, and i was like talking to rasina about it, and i ended up sobbing.

That is so dumb right.

Cant be helped.

everything also cant be helped.

what do you want me to do?

I'm feeling super hopeless now. just feel like giving up and waiting for someone to catch me.

And im waiting for 2 a.m so that i can call Rasina and wake her up, and feel so thankful she's always there for me. Seriously, i feel like there's nothing that i hide from her, because i know she'll be angrier, and even sadder if i dont share with her, than when she hear of my sad news. There are many things that i hide from people, and yeah, they're close to me, and because they are, i always fear that whatever i tell them sort of burden them you know what i mean?

Sometimes i crack.

Rasina's the ultimate glue. yea girl. you really fix me back.

Now im just staring at the picture of the suflower. It reminds me of the first 2008 sunflower we gave to mr chee. i feel so ashamed just thinking of him. im such a fiasco.

Sobs.