
I wanna look right into your eyes, give this smile, and this time, point you this middle finger and say, " FUCK YOU."
~
On a much much heavier note, felt feverish throughout this entire day. it's because of the rain. i tried my best to run, but my bag was so heavy. felt damn tired, so unproductive, kept sleeping.
Just realised how torn apart my life seems to be on the bus ride home today. I dont know what i was doing, i dont know what i want, yet i blindly venture and go into things i find out, i never have interest in. Why am i doing this? i feel so exasperated with myself. i am so afraid of growing up, so afraid of wasting my life away, so afraid of so many uncertainties that i feel like im worrying my life away instead of the opposite.
Songs are irresistibly powerful today, one line speaks a thousand emotions from my heart. i was thinking about my life rather than math today, and i fell asleep. my head feels so heavy really.
i miss the eileen of last time, playing and playing all the time. having fun without a care in the world, changing jobs as and when i like, going out late into nights without worrying about studies. now i feel so chained and so burdened.
im trying to shake this feeling away.
lastly, the fullstop of the day goes to you, for making me feel like im wasting my time and effort on something so insignificant.
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
Labels: no miracles. no hopes. no life.