these silly little wounds will never mend
i feel so far from where i am
so i go, and i will not be back here again,
im gone as the day is fading

i wanna tell myself to give up on maths, but i know i won't. Been consecutively flunking my lecture tests, and this is one lecture test on maths i didnt wanna fail, really badly. Because i missed these lectures on complex while i was attending to my grandmother's funeral proceeding, i had told myself i wanna do well for this topic so i won't... so i won't let her down. Seriously, im such a letdown. you all dont know it thats all.

I am not smart, even though Alex always says i am, i am not. I feel really.. down about it. You can laugh at me, and i can laugh together with you, but after maths, i completely died. Truthfully, i didnt wanna laugh. i didnt wanna joke. But i dont wanna show my sadness.

Hey, i am really sad. This was a promise to someone i love, yet i flunk it, i broke it. This really goes beyond the marks, it really is about me keeping a promise, and wanting so badly to fulfill it so i wanna let her beam at me far away from heaven. i feel like a loser.

I really really dont think i have a plum in onigiri eileen.

i am lost and down.
and i really dont wanna let anyone see me so weak.

Especially in JC, when majority of the people are so.. hypocritical.
I just wanna wallow in this misery.

I'll try to walk out of it soon, but even if i dont, i dont wanna be led out of it.
I'll do it myself.

Labels: how do you sleep?