hello my dear blog. I dont know how to control my emotions, i dont know how to make things right at all. Sometimes i feel redundant, like i cant do anything, especially during the funeral when i really wanted to do something for my granny. I really miss her alot. This is something that is different and nobody will understand. You cant just say you used to have someone close to you dying and thats why you can understand. It is not, because that person may be closer, or not even close, or maybe not that close to you. The thing is, my granny is special, everyone is special, and so everything is different. Initially, seeing her suffer at the hospital, and friends keep telling me that it is best to let her go, and that time i felt that yeah, she could have gone to a better place. But i feel very sad to say i cant register that fact, because when she is gone just like that, and calling out to her does not provoke any action of life, it really breaks my heart.My heart is shattered. But i cried.Life is not the same anymore, for once, truly once in my whole life, i really feel like i dont wanna do anything anymore, i just wanna do nothing. I dont know what i can do, as i stared at her photo and told her secretly that i miss her.BOOO HOOO HOOO.i dont want any rainbows anymore.Labels: strong strong strong but never stronger than yesterday