
fine. update right? fine. type normally, fine then.I have many many things that happened, but now it just seemed as though they are mundane. I dont know what to do, i feel lost alright. Im so frustrated. I dont know what happened, i want to know what happened. What create this distance? What happened? It is really the most tiring thing to do, when something happened, and all you wanna do is to try to find the answer as to why it turned out like this. Do you know the anguish i feel? No, you dont at all. Dont say you know, you wont. you never will. all i demand is really, why? from being so close to totally being nothing at all. I feel so damn tired already, and today, as i lie down on my mom's bed and tried to catch a nap, i woke up with so much a startle, and i looked around me, and said, " XX, where are you?" You may think it is ridiculous, maybe , really. You said i was your inspiration, your motivation. Now you dont need all these anymore. Everything i try, futile. You think, i deserve this right? I took you for granted, didnt cherish your presence. Are you sure? Have you ever asked me? Did you even give me a chance? I admit, this selfish part of me, just want to keep you here with me forever. You said so, you said you'll be there, and i thought you meant forever. Now you turned on your heels and walked away. When things crumble, how i want to run to you and grumble about it. Im so drained. And i occupy myself, just guessing what really went wrong. Maybe i really dont need to, because you dont even care. This is really not the appropriate time to bring this up, but you know, you were my motivation, my inspiration to keep going tough. I realise myself falling apart now. And the sad thing, i really dont care enough to pick myself up from where i fell. Pathetic.The worst thing? That line between X and X is blurred. I thought i know how i feel already. But it doesnt really matter now huh. You're gone.thanks to YX piano for doing a survey on me on her blog.
Sighs.
Labels: As the people leave their way to say hello